Spectre at the Oscars
The Oscars 2017 are upon us and we got invited (in our minds). We are still shocked that we were there (not really) and are so happy to have had this honour (no honour). Check out our press pictures and acceptance speeches from the big night (that never happened).
We are so happy to have won join best actor and all round good guys in the motion picture, ‘life’.
Matthew Alexander DiCaprio’s
Matthew Alexander DiCaprio’s Oscar was well earned for his wonderful performance as Derek, the fishmonger turned international lethario, in the film Fish Fingers.
Matthew DiCaprio “When I first started out in acting I dreamed of this day. The other actors were robots and I was dressed in just a bath robe but this is essentially the same. I’d like to thank my family and lovely partner, I couldn’t do it without you. Also Nana Washington for his advice ‘Raise your game and they’ll beat a path to your door with golden statues’. Priceless.”
Heartthrob Nana Washington won his fifth Oscar for his lead role in Open, a gripping tail of a man getting over his fear of being Photoshopped.
Nana Washington “I’m over the moon with this, my fifth Oscar. I’d like to thank my beautiful girlfriend for all her support, the directors for making such great casting choices and of course all the Nanatics out there. I wouldn’t be here without you, there’s a topless GQ shoot in the pipeline as a thank you.”
Craig ‘Christoph’ Waltz
The ever youthful Craig ‘Christoph’ Waltz won his first Oscar in the coming of age film Geek. The judges commented ‘It was the way he took his glasses off, shook his hair and realised he was sexy that really sold it for us. A stellar performance’
Craig Waltz “When I’m asked who inspired me to be so great, I have to say it’s me. I’m nailing this acting thing. I can take my glasses of, shake my hair and realise I’m sexy with the best of them and now I have the Oscar to prove it. I have to get in a thank you to my cat. He’s the best.”